Comparison leads to frustration. For most of us, seeing others succeed in an area that they believe they should be successful in causes us to look down on our progress. Being spiritual doesn’t prevent this natural tendency. However, we can learn to “tame” it deliberately. Like a complex AI machine, we can “train” our minds not to succumb to this natural tendency to compare ourselves with others.
We know that the grass always seems greener on our neighbor’s lawn. We tend to ignore the work they put into making their lawn look that way, though. We also tend to ignore how long it took them to get their lawn looking as green.
Here are some quick ideas on how to tame this tendency to compare:
1. Remember that the people who are already successful or making relevant moves today did not start there. They possibly identified their area of interest earlier than you did and have spent time refining their skills. The journey of self-discovery and actualization takes each of us different lengths of time to complete. So, comparing ourselves with others is not a fair assessment.
2. Focus on your own race. Appreciate your own journey. As much as possible, learn from those who are ahead of you – regardless of their age. They’ve logged more hours than you have, and so have figured things out that might take you a while to figure out on your own. Obviously, you have to spend time developing yourself. Being intentional about controlling your focus will make a world of difference on your process of self development. Focus on learning from others, instead of comparing yourself to them.
Doing these 2 quick things will help you harness the natural tendency to compare ourselves to others. Don’t compare yourself to others to feel bad. Instead, focus on learning as much as you can from them.
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Ugo is an energetic and dynamic youth leader, and also the president of the nonprofit, NEU Gen Leaders. He is the author of 2 books – The NEU Era and Secrets of Academic Excellence. He can be reached at [email protected].